One year ago right now the fire in my loungeroom was blazing, hotter than before or since.
One year ago right now I knelt on blankets and mattresses in front of the blazing fire holding my tiny son.
One year ago right now I felt the wave begin to crash over me and handed my son to his father so I could concentrate on the contraction that would finally help his placenta be born.
One year ago my loungeroom was full of blood and towels and blankets and water and hot hot hot fire and precious people and love, so much love.
The mess is gone, the people are sleeping and the fire just barely sputtering but the love is still here.
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2 comments:
congratulations! babies birthdays are so much as much for their mamas!
a few weeks after both my (also home)births i wrote out the story. now, at birthdays, i can go back and read it. just to myself, it's pretty gritty. but maybe when my babies are grown into adults i'll share.
when i was a kid, my mom always woke me up on my birthday saying, "this time, ___ years ago, we were calling the midwife..." and some other sweet details.
not sure how i'll continue that tradition...
"well, this time __ years ago, i was in the most unbelievable pain you can imagine... questioning the whole proposition of having a baby, and ready to give up."
heh, heh. better to skip straight to those transcendently joyful hours AFTER, eh? although, to myself, i sort of like to remember the pain, since it's over and i can just feel proud and strong for it.
happy BIRTHday!
Happy (belated) birthing day xoxo
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